Pop

Google's going public. You may have heard. Or not.



It's hard to say; to me, it seems like this is all anyone's been talking about anyway. The pressfolk lurking outside our offices today seem to suggest a general interest. But my perspective is probably a bit skewed.



I've never been more proud to work at Google than when I read the S-1. Ever since seeing a Frontline about how auctions were the solution to IPO corruption, I had dreamed of the day when some responsible corporation could show Wall Street how it's done. I never would have guessed that I'd be working for the company in question when it happened.



I also am glad about the dual class offering. Larry Page points out all the remarkable things that make Google a unique place to work in his Founder's Letter. Any system that allows him and the current management team to retain control is a good one in my book. My god, the man specifically called out free lunches as an important part of employee culture!



Finally, I love the fact that, as noticed on /., the actual sum to be raised by the IPO is $2,718,281,828 or e x 10^9. Given that I was a debater, quizbolwer and officer of the math club, it's really something to be at a place where I don't even come close to the top of the dork-o-meter.

Instructions

Another Sunday, another pleasant afternoon working up a head of rage while reading about the state of the world in Harper's.



There's a nice piece about the various legislation that small communities have passed ordering their local police departments not to comply with Patriot Act investigations.



Which got me thinking about an idea for an educational campaign. In the tradition (and, possibly, style) of the School House Rocks civics lesson, it would be called America: Looks Good on Paper.



Essentially, it's a way to let people know about their fundamental rights as guaranteed by the Constitution. Whereas each phrase of the Constituion can be dissected with hundreds of years of case law, I believe the overall import is easily understood.



Episode One would start with the title card: "The 4th Amendment: Damn, That Seems Pretty Specific!" And then it would be followed by the text of the amendment as read by some easily-snagged celebrity. Maybe Leonard Nimoy.

The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

Later episodes could be more fanciful, like, "Which Amendments are Better: Odds or Evens." (Odds). Or "Habeas Corpus: Suspend This!"

Glory

Sometimes it's good to have folks over on a Saturday night for a few drinks and chance to gaze upon the visage of pure evil.

Mind over Machine

Something a computer does better than me: figure out what I can spell with my phone number.



Something I do better than a computer: spontaneously realize upon waking that, in the movie Clueless, Alicia Silverstone's somewhat-pudgy best friend was played by Brittany Murphy.



Try to figure that one out AI scientists! I'd been dreaming about spiders for goodness sake!

Keepsake

Been doing some cleaning around the place and I stumbled upon a sekrit cache of mementos. In particular, I found my notes from a working offsite I attended at my last job.



Herewith are the top 10 Death Metal Band Names inspired by a Seminar on Modern Portfolio Theory:

1. Pain Index


2. Capital Death


3. The Soul Process


4. Fund of Mental Breakdown


5. Blood Equity


6. Benchmarked for Torture


7. Too Much Fund


8. Impaled Asset


9. Fifty-Two Week Low


10. Starkfolio Homicide

LazyBlog

I love the idea of moblogging and I love that my friends do it so I don't have to.



To wit, Sutter's got documentary proof that we saw Hellboy this weekend at SF's best theater, the Coronet. Word is that the Coronet, the only one-theater movie palace in town that still shows first-run features, is due to be demolished. The Goldman (grr) Institute on Aging has bought the place and is going to sent up some kinda death dormitory in its place. But that geriatric sword of Damocles has been hanging over the Coronet for 4 years, and I still got to see a ruddy Ron Perlman whoop demonic butt.



Later on, Sutter captured the slender elegance of my new live-in lover, the Sony Grand Wega. I'd been waiting to meet my sweetheart for 6 weeks and when she finally arrived, I melted. With a 42" diagonal, my baby's definitely a larger woman, but deceptively light-weight and only a foot deep. For her debut, I had some folks over and we howled at The Big Lebowski.

Petri

Devil's Playground documents the Amish rite of passage known as rumspringa whereby 16 year-old Amish kids are allowed to experience the 'real world.' You know, drink, drive ... roll over on crank dealers in order to avoid jailtime, etc.



In explaining the philosophy behind rumspringa, Faron Yoder (the main teen subject of the movie) explains that it's like a vaccination. It's meant to give teens a taste of what they won't have so that they don't end up missing it.



Faron ends up snorting a lot of vaccine.



The ostensible tension of rumspringa is that the kids have to make a choice at the end of it: continue to live in the real world or join up with Amish church. However, it's basically a false choice. The 'real world' the kids experience is a hyper-realized and completely closed teenage existence. They only hang out with other Amish teens. Most still live at home.



So while they're allowed to throw as many drunken Amish parties as they want (usually at their parents' farms), their understanding of what it means to be a teenager is completely involuted. As in everyday teenage life, things trend towards homogeneity - it turns out that kids are good at picking up what's considered cool despite an austere upbringing. Amish kids quickly go from being completely bewildered by Wal-Mart's CD section to healthy pop culture consumers thanks to the social cues of their peers (and, you know, MTV).



But because of the in-bred nature of their society (even before getting the same haircut, the kids look a lot alike if you know what I'm sayin') and the temporary nature of their furlough in the real world, any random behavioral mutation will quickly spread through the group. To wit, the aforementioned crank.



It's interesting that even when completely strung out on meth-amphetamines these kids never question their faith. Heaven and hell are completely real and definite places. It must be a really bad trip to be totally spun on meth and the only thought rattling through your head is that you're bound for a literal hell much worse than the one in which you're trapped.



As if all of this weren't enough reason to see the flick, it's also got a great soundtrack. Selected Ambient Works volumes 1 and 2.

Wifi Up High

Boeing announced its plan to offer in-flight internet connectivity:

The flat rate, which would give a user unlimited Internet access, will cost $29.95 for flights lasting longer than six hours. Each three- to six-hour leg will be charged at $19.95, while access on trips under three hours would cost $14.95.

That's no free hotspot at the local coffee shop, to be sure, but I was expected something far more pricey. I mean, doesn't it cost like $20 to make a 4 minute phone call in the air?



One weird detail ... the initial plan is for wireless and they hope to offer Ethernet later on. Seems a tremendous expense to go around laying wires to every seat for people who will only have laptops.

Gray

A while back, Gavin at gavinsblog.com linked to and excerpted a post in which Dr. John "Men are Mars ..." Gray was alleged to be a fraud. The claim is that he doesn't actually have a PhD.



His lawyers caught wind and sent a nastygram - not to the person who originally posted the story, or the authors of the original outing in Men's News Daily - but to Gavin. Which is pretty beat.



But also funny because in the letter, his lawyers attempt to establish his bona fides by pointing out that "Previously, Dr. Gray received his Master's degree from the Maharishi European Research University ... where he also obtained his Bachelor's degree."



I'm sure Maharishi U. is a totally legit university. They've even got an MBA program which combines higher consciousness and professional excellence. I really dig the illustration on this page ... dude meditating + flip chart with Feynman diagram showing something assuredly managementory.



Apparently, you can maximize profits through the proper application of transcendental meditation and quantum mechanics.

Live from the bathroom at SXSW

My cell phonaphobia may have finally caught up to me. I'm sitting outside the men's room on a conference call ... that's where they keep the pay phone. Of course, the wireless is really good so, there's that.